It was the longest night i had in years. After returning from Operation Theater to the labour room, nurses put 3 blankets on me and around my head cus of the severe shivering. Blood loss and cold air, made the shiver worst. I heard Dr. Fawas announced my blood loss was 200, i'm not sure if dat's good, bad or normal.
A few moments after returning to the labour room, the new Abah of TWO came in and kissed me on my forehead... It was a bliss bliss moment. I'm sure lying down like dat, with all those 'sembapness' and painful look i didn't look to pretty to be kissed but he did. He told me Khayra's doing very fine, dah iqamat and kenal nama dia. He called her name and she responded to his voice; maybe cus she's been called Khayra eversince she's in the womb. He also told me he wants to go home soon, to give Khayra's placenta to my dad to be 'kebumi' and to prepare the house for Khayra's arrival. I told him go... go get some sleep cus we don't know what's in for us in the next few days. It's like... i already felt 'tak sedap hati' especially when nurse announced Khayra's weight was only 2.1 kg.
As i said earlier... it was a long long night. I was shivering bad and fell asleep for a couple of hours before waking up feeling the operation wound's pain coming in and very very thirsty. 6 hours before and after surgery is to haf NO FOOD or DRINKS. one of suckiest part of a surgery and i knew it too well. It's like a feeling of deja vu, Jazz's labour and my previous appendix removal, both felt the same way. THIRSTY & PAINFUL! i kept on asking the nurses who came in and out to check my readings "Nurse dah pukul berapa? Dah boleh minum?" and I'll receive the same answer "Belum Puan, rehatlah, pagi esok baru boleh minum" or "Puan dari tadi tak tido ke?" if the nurses tried to avoid my 'drinking' questions. Kesian nurse nurse tu, dapat patient tak paham bahasa hehe.
I could only drink at 8 am the next morning, itupun dapat air suam sahaja, no food yet. tepat pkl 8 nurse dah datang bagi air, paham agaknya aku dah haus macam nak mati. Abah came in around 12 am, lambat sikit katanya sebab mengemas dan mencuci cot anak. As if all had been planned, once abah arrived he's been called upstairs by a nurse. "Encik, diorang panggil naik atas, anak kena admit NICU [Neonatal Intensive Care Unit]". AGAIN my jantung felt like nak gugur, "Why?!" i almost screamed. "Kami tak sure Puan, orang atas yang panggil". Azam looked at me and told me to rest and not to worry. How could i NOT be?? i tried to take my mind off it by sending SMSes to mum, Achik, Mummy Melaka n Yana. Take my mind off it??!! all the SMSes was ABOUT it. I can't rest. My BP went up n down. Nurses looked at me in worried look. Doctors came in and out. A few moments after going upstairs i received and SMS from Azam "Khayra kena admit NICU sebab saiz dia kecik sangat and pink sugar level dia rendah so Doktor Pakar nak observe". I was already in tears.
Azam missed his Friday prayers arranging Khayra's transfer to NICU. He returned to me around noon and told me the details. Khayra's not in an incubator, but on drips. *sigh* both mother and daughter going through the same thing. we're both on drips. but I am 27 years old, Khayra's barely a few hours old, i couldn't bare thinking of the uncomfortness she's going through. I asked d doctor when am I going back to the ward, doctor said at least one more night of careful observation here, dat is, if my BP go stable, i urinate a lot and I can get up by myself so they can take off the catheter [urine pipe] so i can walk to the bathroom by myself. Another deja vu. I remembered i was a bit 'manja' during Jazz's surgery and had only got outta bed after two days. but now, i set my heart to get up as soon as i can, so i can go to see Khayra. she is all i can think off at that moment. if last nite was the longest nite, that day was the longest day... the day of my new daughter's birthday, Friday January 12th, 2007.
I could receive no visitor since I'm in the labour room for intensive observation. I only had my patient Azam with me. It surprises me how calmly he's taking this situation. I could see that he is tired, he prolly gets as little sleep as i did too. I thank God, although it wasn't an easy moment for both of us, but we're very patient going through it. Maybe my faith to Him paid off. I prayed to Him every second i could dat i recover well so i can tkae care of Khayra, get her to a normal state as soon as possible. Owh how i long to hug her! I haven't seen her since last time in OT.
That nite was another long night but i had a determination to get well tomorrow and get out of bed. I tried very hard to sleep. 13 January 2007, 5 am in the morning, a very kind nurse [i could never forget her] Nurse Suria Eliaty came into my room and gave me some words of motivations. She said it's her duty to change my hospital gown and clean my bed, but it is good if i can get down on my feet, try to at least sit down on a chair, so doctors will decide that I am well enuff to be transfered back to the ward. I said yes, i very much wanna do just dat. I asked her to help me, and i apologize beforehand cus it's gonna be very very slow. She raised my upper bed, lowered the height, and I tried very very hard to ignore my wound's pain as I step down on the floor. She was smiling, she said she never see anyone so determine to get up. I told her i wanna see my baby in the NICU, she said no wonder and encouraged me dat i can do it, and i DID! i didn't just sat on a chair, i even went to the toilet! She was so happy for me, I was moved by her patience and kind-heartedness. I sat on the chair while she changed my bedsheet with a fresh one, she helped me wear my maternity pad and hospital gown, she tied my hair up high, as if she opened a salon in that labour room. another nurse came in with a gasp, and she boasted to her "Tengok patient aku dah bangun, dah pegi bilik air" and dat nurse was smiling too. I felt proud!! So now i am NOT AFRAID of another C-section after this. i know i can recover well!
It's true, u need to move to recover from operation wound. U can't just lie there like a dead meat. After the success i went back to bed and who knows, it was the best sleep i had in days! Lega sangat-sangat. kaki dah tak cramp, i could feel blood moving in my veins again. And alhamdulillah, doctors agreed i could go back to the ward BEFORE lunch and could request a wheel chair to visit Khayra in NICU. with dat news, i SMSed Azam to come ASAP, as i can't wait to see Khayra!
to be continued...
P/S: I hope pembaca setia blog ni tak bosan baca cerita-cerita ini, cus i wanna keep record of every single thing dat happened to us in those testing moments!
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