Penangan Berjalan Kaki

Since me n Jazz dah terperap kat umah ni agak lama [for me it's damn long], so i decided to bwk Jazz jalan-jalan gi Alamanda semalam, along with Mein n Ateem. Ingat nak naik bas ke Alamanda, tapi usually busses dun stop at the direction towards Alamanda from my house, it usually stops at the opposite direction and go around the world [hehe around Putrajaya sbnrnya, tapi lembs nak mampos, jauh dia pusing2]. So me n Mein decided okla, kita jalan kaki slow-slow and stop kat bus stand to rehat kejap.

Budak2 dua orang tu jalan 5 kali lagi laju dari Umi yang terkedek-kedek ni. Happy Feet kan, sebijik. passers-by agaknya dalam hati berkata-kata 'eee mak buyung ni dah sarat macam ni ada hati nak berjalan-jalan lagi'. tataulah, ke aku yang terasa sendiri ni hehe.

Alamanda from my house bukan jauh pun...!!! tak cayer tanya Achik n Has, dekat nak mampos. dulu taderhal ulang-alik gi Alamanda, in fact kalau ikutkan si Mein i think she spend more time there than at home. dia punya 1st house, bukan lagi 2nd. Tapi tulah dengan keadaan physical yang begini, walking to Alamanda becomes a big issue.

Pegi ok, balik ok. Sampai sana bwk the kidz makan McD, gi Carrefour beli vitagen si Jazz dan brg2 kiriman Ucu n Nenek, makan ice cream... balik, naik bas. balik ok lagi, bleh mengiron sambil tgk DVD. then, malam, dah mandi, baring kejap, bisanya mula terasa.

Nak bgn ke toilet pun nak terjerit. Nak berjalan, taking one step is full of agony. Sakitnya belakang n kaki tak terkata. Area ari-ari pun pedih semacam je. Abah pulak kebetulan balik lambat, sebelum tu Jazz dah jadik mangsa kepenatan Umi. kesian Jazz kena marah teruk, sebab dia tak berenti merengek bila terbgn dari tido yang tak puas. Later on dat nite I had a word with myself tanak marah Jazz or Khayra teruk-teruk and pray to God to save em from any pain and to increase my patience with my kids. Tulah orang kata rehat kat umah nak jugak berjalan. Tengok dah kelam kabut satu umah jadiknya.

Jadik mak seriously bukan senang. susahnya nak control perasaan 'amarah' tu...! kadang2 bila duduk sorang-sorang pikir balik, kenapa kita mesti marah-marah dekat anak-anak kecik. diorang bukan paham pun. kalaupun paham diorang belum cukup matang nak pikir, kita yang matang ni pulak terbawak-bawak perasaan tu. Susah kan? especially orang yang memang sedia baran like myself. Yang makin sayunya, when both of us finally calmed down, I bathed her, and ask her does she forgive me for hitting her, though she was still sobbing, she nods her head hard. Budak-budak, cepat forgive and forget. Throughout the nite, I tried my best to be very very soft with her. But i was still very furious with myself sampai terbgn pukul 4 pagi and takleh tido balik mengenangkan penangan yang sampai ke peha anak semalam.

Hari ni she acts as if i never did anything to her. Dia bgn dgn cerianya, mandi sendiri, pakai baju sendiri, mintak susu macam biasa, tgk tv and gelak-gelak mcm biasa. Amazing how kids can heal their pain so fast. Kalau kita? oklah kalau myself, my merajuk could go on for days. i think Jazz is a lot tougher than I am, inside. She's going be a great girl. May God bless her and save her from any kind of bad circumstances. Amin.